Friday The 13th (2009)


Marcus Nispel


Damian Shannon

Mark Swift


Jared Padelecki – Clay Miller

Danielle Panabaker – Jenna

Amanda Righetti – Whitney Miller

Travis Van Winkle – Trent

Aaron Yoo – Chewie

Derek Mears – Jason Voorhees

Jonathan Sadowski – Wade

Julianna Guill – Bree

Ben Feldman – Richie

Arlem Escarpeta – Lawrence

Ryan Hansen – Nolan

Willa Ford – Chelsea

Nick Mennell – Mike

America Olivo – Amanda

Kyle Davis – Donnie


Why the hell is there a lens flair out in the middle of the woods?

There is just some franchises that really don’t have to be remade. I don’t care what people say there was really no need to update the Friday the 13th series. I wasn’t the biggest fan of the later movies but they were what they were. Unapologetically badly written but they delivered on the sex and blood the series was known for. So we end up with yet another remake of a franchise that I grew up with and it’s by Platinum Dunes… which explains the stupid lens flair.

We do get a little back story, there was no way they could have done a Friday the 13th without Jason, so we get to see Mrs. Voorhees die. Instead of them trying to reopen the camp we get a group of people heading out into the woods in order to find weed. Seriously? They are going out there for two of the guys to find some weed that locals told them about. Now all that being said this is about one thing, the return of Jason Voorhees and I’m cool with that. I just wish they had something that was decent in the terms of a storyline instead of this lam crap. Now later on we get group of people heading into the area for camping and a guy searching for his sister.

Now they make it pretty clear in a couple of segments that the towns people know that Jason is still out there. Now I also have mixed feeling on this one, I feel like it worked in the film Hatchet because he wasn’t a physical being but this was different. There is no way a modern police force wouldn’t go after someone who has killed a large number of people. It just doesn’t work that way.

Some of the kills were original but I have a hard time with a few things. One of the first kills involves a woman tied into a sleeping bag and hung over a fire until she is cooked to death. When we had Kane Hodder as Jason there would be no way that this kill would have happened, at least I think he wouldn’t have gone for it. The thing is that Jason has always been a very visceral killer. It was all about stabbings and skull crushing with the occasional sleeping bag kills but that was way different. Some may say that I kind of bitched about the later movies for their bad attempt at writing but one thing they always had was awesome kills. Now one kill that I did really like involved taking a screwdriver to the throat.

We do get some kills that looked ridicules unfortunately. There is one where the machete stabs down into a girl’s head and she is lifted out of the water by it. Now I did not see a KNB effect group credit so I wasn’t expecting something mind blowing but I do want they to make things a brutal as the older movies were, U feel like we got the movie tht would have been fantastic for teenagers but real horror fans maybe a bit disappointed.

The characters and acting is just what I did expect from this movie and that may or may not be a slam depending on what you are looking for. We do get attractive women who have no problem taking their tops off which normally means they are fodder for Jason to kill. For example is there a real reason why a woman was wakeboarding topless? The woman who played those rolls are about as good of actors as they were before. Now I am a big Kane Hodder fan but I am also a huge fan of Derek Mears who is the new Jason. He looks awesome as Jason… I liked him better than the dude from Freddy vs Jason though I don’t think that says much. _______ and ______ are both great in their roles, this is the first time I’re really watched her in a film and I can say that I would look out for her again.

This boils down to people wanting to make a little money off of a name that in the past was important to the horror genre. Instead of it being people who seem to truly love the genre for what it is we get Michael Bay and his crew remaking a film that should have never been touched. If there is one thing I could say to Bay and he company is STAY AWAY FROM THINGS I LIKE.

As for a grade its hard to do because I’m trying to judge it as a movie which is nothing special by any means. Not only did they not come up with anything original but they seemed to not care about anything that was established previously. Biggest example Jason takes a hostage which made no sense to me at all.

Grade F


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